Munsoned.

Well i have some big news, after you last heard from me i was heading toward Montana for a ranchers open mic convention, crossing the wyoming boarder i was hit and injured severely by a buffalo deer mob nearly loosing some function of my hand connector.  The trooper cop who first arrived at the accident area called in a 409 and i was helicottered (new type of flying machine) back to Des Moines where they have a unit the deal specifically with hand connectors. Upon arriving back at the place i had just left after a luscious sopen (surprise open mic) mic i was brought into a professional hospital to save my hand connector. In fear i might loose some function of my hand connector Dr Kennis put me in an coma sleep so they could keep my hand under loose observation.

Well Dear readers about 4 hours ago i finally awoke from my inducted coma sleep, and for the first time in nearly 10 months i was awake. I felt just like Thom Crugers character must have felt in the hollywood motion picture "Vandella Sky", and to top it off my hand connectors hadn't lost any function, they worked just like when i was a kid and i lived at the king author court apartments in Georgia state. I high fived Dr Kennis so hard he said "ouch hank, you slow down you've been gone for a long time and things have changed".

Well i had seen Vandella Sky before so i knew that during my coma half my family had probably died, that their were probably flying Raz'or Scooters now and that Tina Turner was most likely now president of the council. So i prepared my self for the speech but the doctor didn't have any typical post coma news instead he went on to tell me that my Open Mic Consortium insurance doesn't cover coma sleeps and that i had amassed 367.00 $ in hospital coma fees, and that my car, a 1968 Dubuque town car ,was donated to a farmer to keep hoses in during the winter. In minutes i had gone from thinking i was in Vandella Sky to being broke and carless. "At least half my family didnt die", i said.

Dr Kennis then chimed in"Actually your mom did die, she was hit by a foul ball at a Baseball match and died of complications, but don't think about that. Whats important is that your not allowed to leave Des Moines until your expenses are paid. Anyway i have to go wash my expensive Mountain bike, good luck Hank" and Dr Kennis walked out.



I didn't know what to do, i was newly in debt, stuck in Des Moines till i could get my bills paid, lost my car machine and my mom was the victim of a baseball match accident. I decided that i was not in Vandella Sky at all but rather the Divney film, Flight Of the Navigatore. Which meant until i was picked up by a martian ship i was stuck in Des Moines and this alternate time lock until the deceptive alien that took me here  came to take me back to the real universe. So thats where i am a former Open Mic writer sitting on the side of the street in down town Des Moines in scrubs, wracked with hospital bill debt, waiting to be picked up by my alien Navigatore and cold, im just so damn cold.

"May our Children For give us" -Bill Poleman, Indepentant Day

Hank

Update- 7/25/11

Well i waited 4 days and an alien didn't come and pick me up, So I've decided to become a Music writer in Des Moines to pay off my debt so i can eventually leave for hollywood. Most likely though I will  find memorable connections in this city and decide to stay after learning that the people here are magic, especially the old kermuggen doctor. In case you we're wondering that isn't the plot to Doctor Hollywood staring Mike Fox, my story has a music writer not a doctor, anyway this blog will be where i post my reviews and occasionally ill just let ya know how im doing in my struggles as well while i pay off my coma debt. See ya around at all the band shows!

The Power is in the Milk

Hank